Your Job Doesn’t Have To Fulfill You
But It Does Have To Leave You With Enough Energy To Pursue the Things That Do: The Right-Sized Role of Work, Part 1
“Hmm,” I contemplated, fingers tapping idly on my desk, “Will Rick be okay with this?”
My dilemma was one we’ve all experienced: I was sending out the weekly, “Hey work fam, time to order office supplies,” email in verse form, adapting ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas to say, “If you need paper clips, let me know.”
I’d cast the owner of the company in the role of St. Nicholas, but was having a rare moment of “Does this cross the bounds of professional standards?” contemplation.
Ultimately, I shrugged and sent it out. I didn’t have any more time to worry about his reaction. My friends were going out for a smoke break and I wanted to join them.
This, dear reader, is the exact right way to treat a job.
The exact right way.
At the time--more than a decade ago, now--I was working a recovery job. I was fresh outta rehab and had secured a receptionist role through a temp agency.
I wasn’t trying to build my career. I had no desire to be at the company long-term. I didn’t even want to live where the office was based.
I was there for the paycheck, plain and simple. I was biding time until I built up a nest egg and figured out what to do next.
So, the most responsible thing I could have done (and did do) was have fun on the job. Get my work done, but refuse to let the role cause me any stress. Care less about a perfect email, more about hitting send so I could go outside with my friends.
After all, jobs are meant to be as low-stress as possible.
Confused by that statement? I’m not surprised. In the decade since I had that receptionist role, I’ve frequently forgotten this wisdom as well.
I’m an American living in the twenty-first century. If I’m not careful, it’s easy for me to be sucked into “workism,” the notion that a job is meant to be my alpha and my omega. That it’s the best way to find happiness and fulfillment, that most of my waking hours should be spent striving to climb, climb, climb.
Fortunately, Liz Gilbert helped me remember that’s not the case.
Liz believes that most of us are confused about work. We’ve forgotten that there’s a difference between a:
Hobby
Job
Career
Vocation
Each is vastly different from the other and confusing them is a surefire way to suffer.
Hobby
A hobby, according to Liz, is something you do “purely for pleasure.” It’s something that you do for the joy of it, a way to claim time for yourself and celebrate that you’re not just a robot “paying the bills and waiting to die.”
Writing can be a hobby. So can painting or crocheting or drumming or working on cars. My brother Thor’s favorite hobby is collecting the wings off of dead bugs and gluing them on cards that he sends to the elderly. And that’s his right. To each his own.
Hobbies aren’t just low stakes--they’re no stakes. You don’t have to make money from your hobby or get famous from it. You simply have to enjoy it.
Should you happen to not have any hobbies, that’s also alright. No one has to have a hobby; it’s not required. It is, however, a very nice thing to have. One that makes life much richer and more rewarding.
Job
A job, conversely, is something you do have to have, unless you’re financially independent, retired, supported by someone else or have found a way to live that does not require you to rely on a paycheck.
Your job is what you do to pay your bills and exist in a money-based system. Nothing more and nothing less. A job is NOT your whole life. It’s what you do to survive in the material world.
It doesn’t have to fulfill you or make all your dreams come true. It simply has to pay you.
A job should never overtake your life. You may not like it or wake up excited to go to it, but you should be able to leave with plenty of fuel left in your tank. If that’s not the case, if you go home exhausted and depleted and have no energy left for your life, you’re in the wrong job.
There are other ways to earn a paycheck, ways that won’t come at such a high cost. Go find one of those. My uncle, for example, can’t wait until he retires from his career so that he can try out people-facing jobs, like being a barista or serving at a diner. One of my favorite people is currently contemplating stepping down from a lucrative job in healthcare to go work at Costco. She’s drained after years of plugging away at her career and working a low-stress job for a while sounds nice.
Career
Should you happen to have a career--which, like a hobby, is not necessary--you’re doing more than earning a paycheck. You’re working towards a personally meaningful goal, a mission that you care about. This mission could be related to the work you’re doing, the tribe you want to belong to, or the quality of life you want to provide for yourself or your family.
A career often requires sacrifices, like taking work stress home, but you consider that an acceptable trade-off. You’re invested enough in what you’re doing to think it’s worth it. Your career is meant to give you a sense of purpose, to make you feel like you’re part of something bigger than yourself.
Does it have to be your passion or make you blissfully happy? No—although I certainly believe that's possible and wish it for you. It must, however, fulfill you. Otherwise, the sacrifices aren’t worth it.
If you find yourself in a career that you despise, you have a problem--a much bigger one than if you find yourself in a job that you dislike.
Not into your job? No big deal--you’re just there for a few hours then you go home and live your life. If it’s unpleasant, find a different one. There are a lot of ways to pay your bills.
Hate your career? Bigger deal. If you’re making significant sacrifices for something you despise, or if the mission that used to motivate you no longer matters, you have a real problem.
Liz’s advice if you find yourself in that situation? “Quit your career and just go get a job, something that lets you pay your bills and have a life.”
Or, perhaps, if you’re not quite at the “I’m done with this career” stage, consider trying boundaries. Will the world implode if you stop making yourself available 24 hours per day? Or will you instead be promoted, like my friend Julie?
Vocation
A vocation is a sacred and mystical calling, “a Divine invitation” to participate in the process of creation. It’s “the voice of the Universe in your ear,” asking you to use your talents and gifts in a particular way. What it is (being a mother, writing, growing your bug-wing-card empire) matters far less than how it makes you feel. With a vocation, you don’t just make sacrifices—you gladly make them.
According to Liz, “a vocation is the highest possible pursuit that you can do” and it’s fully yours. No one else gets to assign you a vocation. No one else gets to take it away once you have one.
Importantly, not everyone has one. You don’t need to have a vocation to have an amazing life on this planet. But, if you happen to have one, you do need to understand the ways it’s different from your hobbies, your job or your career.
A vocation owes you nothing. It doesn’t owe you a paycheck, much less wealth. It doesn’t owe you fame or glory. It doesn’t even promise that anyone will ever see or appreciate what you create.
You can pursue your vocation in obscurity for years--or your whole lifetime. And, if it’s truly your vocation, you accept that. You’ll keep creating anyway because what you get from it becomes as essential to you as air. You’re not you when you’re not engaged with your vocation.
An Example
Long before writing brought Liz fame and wealth, she recognized that being a writer was her sacred vocation.
And, thank goodness for all of us who adore her, she embraced it. She wrote every day even when no one read what she wrote. She wrote until she had things to submit and then she wrote as the rejection letters rolled in.
She wrote and she wrote and she wrote, knowing that she’d continue writing until the day she died, even if no one ever published a single word of it.
Simultaneously, she was very intentional about how she earned her living.
Liz knew that she needed ample free time to pursue her vocation. So she exclusively took jobs to earn a paycheck.
She didn’t yield to the cultural pressure to climb an invisible ladder and build a career. She insisted on having a job that ended when her shift ended so she could go home and write. So she served and bartended and nanny-ed and did what she needed to do to keep the lights on and be able to afford to go on vacations every now and again.
Eventually, once she started getting paid, writing also became her job. Today, it's her career as well. It’s now how she earns an abundant living and she’s willing to make sacrifices for the career of being a writer.
However, she knows that it can be taken from her. If you or I decide to stop buying her books, paying to hear her speak, or otherwise giving her our attention, her career is over.
But her vocation won’t be.
The Bigger Picture
This clarification of types of work isn’t just relevant for writers. It’s helpful for all of us.
All. Of. Us.
Personally, learning about these distinctions changed my life. And, in the week that I’ve spent back at my keyboard publishing morning musings, it’s the single most interesting idea I’ve shared. People want to know about this.
People who have careers that aren’t working for them. People who have a job but yearn for a career. Even people like me who haven’t worked in a few years. We all care.
Because we all want to have rich, rewarding, fulfilling lives. We all want to thrive. Radically, if possible (thanks Lynn Burns).
So here’s some Liz Gilbert wisdom bundled up in a Keely Copeland curation. If it helps you, please let me know. Then don’t forget to send Sam a note. He loves it when his non-job-or-career-having wife insists she has helpful things to say about the world of work.
But really–thank you hubby. Sam (a man who both has a career that fulfills him and makes significant sacrifices for it) has given me that chance to take time off from work to pursue my sacred vocation. And I count my lucky stars on a daily basis.
P.S. Want to hear Liz say this all in her own words? Listen to this podcast episode: “Elizabeth Gilbert on career vs calling” on “Hello Monday with Jessi Hempel”
